Hello online Friends,
It’s been a while and I hope you’re easing beautifully into autumn! When I stopped blogging I had no idea how long that would last. I just knew I’d kinda said all I wanted in this format – and perhaps I’ve learned all I can too.
If I’m brutally honest with myself, I want a lot less ‘light’ friendships (because I’m very good at hiding behind these) and maybe need to clear space in the mind to accept that I’m not someone who makes deep connections quickly or easily – learning to be ok with that, to just accept myself fully for who I am (a slow living outsider) has been the longest journey.
I’ve spent these past few months recording & editing the audiobook version of The Madness of Sara Mansfield and plan to launch it on All Hallow’s Eve – the day that originated from a pagan holiday honouring the dead. This feels fitting as Alex/Crow’s spirit guide in the book is The Angel of Death and this is a reoccurring theme throughout.
This year I turned 45, which feels properly middle aged; my father passed away, a new granddaughter brings immense joy, we’ve been living in the van but not left these British Isles (November will be 4yrs and we have no plans to stop. I couldn’t live a house again. Ever.).
All these things have me thinking about growing older as well as not wanting to bow to certain beauty ideals of having to chase a certain ‘younger’ aesthetic. There’s a quote floating around the internet: ‘women don’t owe you pretty’. My gods I love that! This is my mantra as I happily embrace the wisdom, self knowledge & radical empathy grown over the years in place of a set of rock-solid abs (although keeping fit & healthy remain a goal as I want to be able to fully enjoy as many of these future years as possible).
It’s unlikely I’ll return to this space in the capacity of old, I’ve changed, and all that energy is now going into the next novels. I will still blog occasionally but the best way to find out about my work is through my (very intermittent) mailing list. I don’t check DMs online so email or Signal/Telegram are best for connecting.
Sent with much love & friendship