Woke thinking of this poem today so decided to go with it and post. It’s too easy to step away from the path of following intuition; the ego wants to start taking over saying, ‘ok this is a pattern so now you have to post at 6am every day for consistency blah blah blah’ or ‘ok, van photos are what get the most likes here so we’ll stick with that.’ But one of the things I wanted to do with this account was to step away from that ‘internal mono-crop’ we’re encouraged to cultivate. Maybe that doesn’t get as many likes or followers because the messages are mixed: am I a poet, or vanlifer, or forager, or wild swimmer, or foodie, or hiker, or nature writer, or rescue dog lover, or traveller, or feminist, or outdoor gear tester, or partner, or mother, or grandmother? Can I be all of these things? Can all of these things stitch together to make one whole woman? My life would not be as rich if any of these elements were removed, and so I choose to be totally open and honest about that with the OUTSIDER Instagram account/blog. It means some people follow then unfollow quote quickly: ‘I wanted vanlife interior pics, not some psychobabble poetry.’ That’s cool, I’m definitely not for everyone, but I’m hugely grateful for those of you who stick around, who accept me in all of this kaleidoscopic shuffling. I know you’re out there, embracing your own multifaceted lives and also refusing to be hemmed into a one-dimensional way of existing in this world. ✊🏽❤️
The truth is that in order to reach real, authentic consistency with this life I‘m having to allow myself the space to be utterly inconsistent for a good while, having faith that I’m heading in the right direction. It also means that when I wake early with an idea I have to run with it, not squash it because otherwise this intuitive working would be killed stone dead. I’ve learned this the hard way, because I’ve killed it so many times, and once it’s gone I have to wait, days, weeks, months for the next intuitive wave to break. The poem appears in my first hand-stitched pamphlet: Prophecy: conversations with my Self. You can download it for free from the Herstory section of my website: SophieMcKeand.com.